Annie Loves Babies

I tidied the playroom. It's amazing how much playing occurs in the playroom after everything is tidied up.  I wrapped this baby in Annie's favorite blanket while cleaning the playroom.  Annie discovered the baby later and started rocking the baby.  She let out big sighs as she hugged the baby and occasionally hummed to the baby.  She rocked the baby for a few minutes and then I ran to get the camera after I relished the moment.  So this is the moment after the moment.  I think it is amazing how nurturing Annie is.  Our other daughter hated dolls initially and is not naturally nurturing.  Although, Kristiana is a sensitive and caring little girl.

7 Quick Takes: What are Miracles?

1.  On Saturday morning, I finished reading The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe to Alex.  In one of the final scenes Aslan feeds a multitude of people and no one knows how he did it or where the food came from.  I paused and said to Alex, "Oh, that's just like Jesus. Do you remember the Bible story of how Jesus fed a crowd of people with only two fishes and five loaves of bread? And afterward there were twelve baskets of leftovers?"

"Yes, but how did he do it?"

"It's a mystery, Alex."  I meant mystery as in things we cannot know about God.

Alex replied,  "Oh! Then let's use logic and science to solve it."  I told him that this mystery was not meant to be solved, but we are to understand that God takes care of us even when it does not seem that there is enough.  I suppose I could have told him the logical explanation that folks have come up with: that people in the crowd were holding out and when Jesus passed around the offering of a child people felt bad and shared what they had.

What are miracles?

2.  People have started to ask, and it's a little embarrassing for me and for them.  People have started to ask when I am due.  When I reply, at the beginning of May, they give this look of shock and say that I have a ways to go!  Seriously, people?  Ever hear of a poker face?  May is only two and half months away.  It's not like I have half the pregnancy to go.  Yes, my belly is way out there.  I usually get to 33-34 weeks and stop growing so much.  I am huge and I don't need people to draw attention to it.  I also don't need a reminder that being huge is not going to be over for some time.  I am not self-conscious about being pregnant, huge and waddling around with my three other tikes.  I just don't like the shocked faces people make.  It' not pretty.  It's uncomfortable to see their reaction.  Am I supposed to comfort you and let you know I will be okay?

3. I do not like comments about how close in age my kids are either.  (This is not true all the time. Only when they question in reference to my pregnancy.)  What is close to some may not be close to others.  I feel like siblings that are 3-5 years apart in age are a little too far apart because when they start going to school they end up being more like strangers to each other.  I think there is a greater opportunity for childhood friendship between siblings that are close in age.  Or maybe not.  I don't really know, but I hear a judgmental tone from folks who question about my kids ages.  "When are you due?…What are your other kids ages?…Oh you have three?!…(judgmental, final) Oh." When people question about my children's ages , they judge something about me, whether it is that I am brave, or crazy, or pity me.  It does not feel very comfortable to witness someone judging you and you may or may not hear their judgement.  And truly, of all things to judge someone about, is this really one of the things that is worth our time?

I try not to judge other parents I see--whether they have one child or many, whether the parents are young or old, single or married, because I do not know their story.  But, I do know what it is like to be a parent, and I know the job is hard enough without people judging you.  I do hope for parents I see that they are raising their kids well and with love.

4. Annie found the rosaries.  I don't keep them put away or well-hidden.  But, she recently discovered them.  She does not do this with our dress up beads as much anymore.  I wonder if she likes the varying styles of beads in the rosaries.  After she played with the beads, she pulled all our religious books from the table for the third time this week.  I do not know what she is looking for.  It's just cute and interesting watching her quietly discover the world.

5. Last week was a little rough with the sick kids.  But, we have had it worse before.  A couple of mornings, I discovered that Annie had thrown up a little in the night (too much mucus in her chest) and she needed a morning bath to wash the stinky smell out of her hair.  She gave me some funny looks while in the bath as though she was not fully awake and did not know what she was doing in the bath.  Sometimes, the looks she gives me remind me of my brother.  She gave me a look like that in the bath, so I took some pictures.  It's her looks and the fact that when she gets naked she runs around sucking in her stomach so that you can see all ribs.  He used to do that to show you how hungry he was. ;-)  Every kid has to have bathing baby pictures for reminiscence later in life.

 

6. I went to the midwife yesterday and was told I was slightly low in iron.  That explains a lot.  More iron, please! I came home and had a spoonful of peanut butter and a couple squares of dark chocolate.  Yay, for high iron treats.  Later, I made burgers for dinner and discovered the bread crumbs I used in the patties had more iron than the peanut butter and chocolate combine.  That was funny to me.  I guess I need to eat more iron rich food in greater volume.  I do eat iron rich foods, so I guess the baby is taking more than that.  I probably need to be better about taking my pre-natal vitamin, drink less caffeine and eat more vitamin C too.

7.  I have been helping to organize a retreat for my Catholic moms group again this spring.  The retreat will be this weekend.  Please say a prayer for the ladies who will be attending.  It is a Eucharist centered retreat.  I am very pleased with the topics and flow of the retreat.  I have had a great team of organizers too, which have helped in the ease of planning and executing.  But, now we are in the final hours before the retreat and I am feeling anxious.  It has not happened yet, and if it flops, it is on my head.  I also have been anxious throughout these days, because I have a few important details to tie up.  It has been very difficult to complete with the household to maintain, the kids to care for and total exhaustion.  (The kids have been waking a lot in the night. I'm average six hours a night.)  But, when the retreat finally arrives all I can do is pray, "Thy Will be done."  And rest it in His hands.

 

Beginning the "Tithe of the Year"

The Great Fast begins tomorrow.  My soul heaves a big sigh, both in mourning for the loss of our luxuries (good-bye coffee creamer), and in relief from the excess.  All things return to God.  Let us sweep away all our distractions that keep us from true communion with our Creator.

Follow these links to Fasting time inspiration:

• Thanks "Fear Not Little Flock," you are so often an inspiration in our Byzantine ritual.

7 Quick Takes on Fasting, Prayer and Almsgiving for Lent

• Great Lent: Journey to Pascha By Alexander Schmemman

• Thanks Fr. Daniel for giving a brief explanation for keeping the Fast (the explanation begins on Page 4 of the Sunday Bulletin):

Suggestions on Keeping the Great Fast

• St. Basil the Great, Homily - On Fasting

And because it can be so difficult to come up with meatless dinner dishes, here are some ideas.  I will post more meatless meal ideas as they come and recipes later on.

My Menu Plan for Two Weeks:

For Breakfast: (break-fast, get it? This is a break in the fast.  If not restricted by childhood, health, or pregnancy, etc., skip breakfast) I have plain oatmeal.  To make oatmeal stick to the ribs a little longer add a couple teaspoons of extra-virgin olive oil.  A couple slices of plain whole wheat toast are good too.  The keyword here is plain--no luxuries piled on top.

For Lunch: (I am pregnant, so this is my opportunity to eat meat while my husband is not around to be tempted.)  Hummus and crackers, Babaganouj and bread, pita, homemade pretzel knots, leftover Lenten soups from dinners, in smaller portions than served at dinner.

For Dinner:

Monday: week one - Orzo Tomato Soup; week two - Red Beans and Rice; Kid sub - condensed tomato soup and grill cheese sandwich

Tuesday: Not every meal has to be meatless; we do need to stock up on some days. This doesn't mean overindulging or eating lots of luxuries.  Traditionally the "strict fast" is kept on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  We eat meatless on M, W, F only, because we find it difficult to make it through otherwise.  Ever so often, we go meatless the entire fast and only eat meat on Sundays.

week one - Chicken Alfredo with spinach and pasta; week two - spaghetti and meatballs marinara

Wednesday: week one - Mexican black bean soup and tortilla chips; week two - Lentil soup and bread; Kid sub - cheese quesadillas

Thursday: both weeks - Cheese take and bake pizza from the grocery store

Friday:  week one - Fresh fish portion and boiled red potatoes; week two - (Gorton's) fried fish filets, french fries and corn

Saturday: week one - Burgers and fruit; week two - meat lasagna and salad

Sunday: week one - Philly Cheesesteak sandwiches and green beans; week two - Burgers and fruit

Another idea is that we are suppose to be giving up luxuries--therefore, I saved a ham bone and a turkey carcass from earlier in the year and will use them in soups over the Lenten period.  I never normally make a bone soup since we live in the land of plenty.  Usually if I make a soup for a meal I only make it for a meatless meal on a fasting day, because my husband says that soup is not a meal.

A final thought:

"Let us fast an acceptable and very pleasing fast to the Lord. True fast is the estrangement from evil, temperance of tongue, abstinence from anger, separation from desires, slander, falsehood and perjury. Privation of these is true fasting." -St. Basil the Great

 

 

I Am Not Worthy

Rembrandt - The Prodigal Son

Shut-ins

What do you do when your sisters have been sick all week and you haven't gone anywhere in days?  You make mud pies in the backyard, and your mom doesn't say anything.  Now when the mud pie ends up thrown against the side of the house, then mom says something and that something may not be so nice.  And Daddy is a little depressed right now, because the backyard is all torn up.  The hole was already there.  We have lows spots in our yard that pool with water when it rains and the grass died.  We have to fix it anyway…

Here's Annie eating her breakfast biscuit and I caught her with her arm around her pal, the dog.  She was jabbering away to her.  When I crouched down to take a picture, she smiled at the camera.  Before now, she had not figured out to smile at cameras.  I have an expensive set of professional photos in which she has a dead face in all shots.

Annie has had fevers since Saturday and Kristiana has had fevers since Tuesday.  Alex has a cough now too, but no fevers.  Annie slept for six hours yesterday and seems better now, but still mucus-y.  I feel a little sick too, but it's not so bad for me.  I think Kristiana has had it the worst.  First thing this morning Kristiana woke up and puked up some nasty mucus everywhere.  I had just woke up and puked too.  Then right before dinner, Annie puked mucus on me.  Yuck.

I have not been anywhere since Sunday when I took the older children to church.  Today, I went to the mail box and back inside.  I thought about taking the kids and dog for a walk in the stroller.  But, the kids have been crabby and clingy so I didn't want to push it.  Plus, I would have had to spend way too long pumping the tires back up.  My husband has agreed to come home early tomorrow and let me go to the gym.

I can't really complain.  It's been a week of cuddling and watching movies and eating biscuits.  We're doing fine.  And a big thanks to my hubby for being supportive as always and helping me tag team the crabby sick bunch-o-kids…I can't believe we're about to have four.  It just feels right.

Prepare The Way Pie

"A voice of one calling: 'In the wilderness prepare the way for the LORD; make straight in the desert a highway for our God.'" (Isaiah 40:3)

My husband totally came up with this week's menu.  He never does that.  I usually ask him what he wants and he says, "I don't know, food. I'm not good at thinking of that stuff."  And then, I huff away.  I think he must be anticipating a strict fast this year.  The year I met him, he had just finished a strict fast.  He pretty much only had a bowl of cereal each day.  He truly relished the Easter feast.  I was totally impressed by his dedication to the fast.

Tonight we had quiche.  Good-bye, eggs. Good-bye, cheese.  Good-bye, cream. (Okay being pregnant, I won't be giving up eggs and dairy the entire Fast.)

Prepare the Way Casserole

"He refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for His name’s sake." Psalm 23:3

Normally, we only make last night's dish on Easter Sunday.  But, my husband requested it as a part of his preparations for the Fast next week.  One can only eat this once or twice a year, because it is so rich.  So here's a recipe that reminds me of both good and evil.  It tastes so good, but too much could be deadly.  It's the Fall wrapped up into one casserole. ;-)  I like to call this dish "Potato Crack."  It's a little bit addictive.  We always end up eating more of it than we intend, because it is so tasty.  But, my husband wanted a grand send off the the luxuries in life.

Cheesy Hash brown Casserole

2 lb. bag of frozen southern-style hash browns
1 can of cream of chicken soup
2 cups of sour cream
1/2 cup melted butter
1/2 cup chopped onions
1/2 tsp each salt and pepper

Mix together in a bowl.  Spread evenly in a 9X13 glass casserole dish.  Bake at 350 F for 45 minutes.

Little Confessions, Part 2 - Keepin' It Real

If you walked in my house right now, what would you see?

• First you would see an Icon corner.  Someone has turned on the stereo underneath our table of religious books, and then flipped up the nice leather ottoman in front of it to hide their devilish deed.

• Then you would see a piano with a number of family photographs hung on the wall above.

• A wet dog is fast asleep on the sofa.

• There are a little bit of toys strewn everywhere: in the living room, all the bedrooms, the bathrooms and a whole lot of toys spread across the playroom/former dining room.

• A very dirty, beat up sofa sits in that playroom and all the cushions have been pull off for jumping on the springs.  But today, the kids have taken blankets off beds, two kitchen chairs, three cushions off another sofa and built a fort.  It's a rainy day.  This is allowed.  There are two calm and happy kids ages three and five sitting inside the fort eating a snack.

• Every bed in the house is unmade--including guest beds.  This is understandable since there is a big fort to be built.

• In the kitchen, a big 28 week pregnant woman is sitting on the floor with a 16 month old baby in her lap, surrounded by laundry baskets and sorting the laundry.  Baby is helping sort.

• There are dirty dishes in the kitchen sink, clean dishes in the dishwasher, toys on the kitchen table and under the table, an unswept floor.

• Sitting on the far counter is a computer playing Gregorian chant music and surrounded by a number of papers: some important and some not.

• In the master bedroom, there is a mess of books--kids books and grown-up books. And a nebulizer machine sits cued up on the bed.

Some days our house is tidy and clean.  Some days it is not.  After a weekend of cuddling and nursing a sick baby, our house definitely is a disaster.  It feels a little overwhelming to think of having to clean it all up again.  At least I had the good sense to set aside the cloth diapers and not use them while baby is sick.  Instead of getting to work on the mess.  I am blogging about it.  God help me--Need grace to clean both heart and home.

Ode to Andrew

I bought Andrew a piano.  Happy Valentine's Day, Honey.

This is my expression of love to you.  I saw a need in your life and I pursued it.

I desired to hear the beautiful music l I know plays within you at all times.

Play on, Andrew.  Play out loud.

"A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:
Its loveliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing…" 
John Keats

Andrew played piano for nine years and finally called it quits when life got serious in college.  I mean, who has time for playing piano when you are courting a beautiful woman, double majoring, being a resident assistant and running for student body president?  Andrew's piano talent was never a big part of our relationship.  He was always too embarrassed to play in front of me.  But, I knew classical music was a big part of his life.  He gave me an appreciation for the great composers that I did not have before I knew him.

He did not really get to play again, except occasionally, for another eight years.  Every time we visit his parents in Washington, Andrew gets a little time to play on their piano.  This last visit Andrew seemed to rifle through his old piano music and play a little bit more than previous visits.  I told him it was time that we buy our own piano.  We have finally settled in a house.  We have space and soon our children would also be old enough for lessons.  Andrew did not believe me because he knows how much pianos cost.  I was determined though to find something we could afford.

I have been checking Craigslist for pianos for the last year.  Finally, I found one worth looking at.  It was in our area too.  Andrew went and played it and said, yes.  We brought it home and had it tuned.  It's not a terribly good piano.  But it will do in the mean time.  Most importantly, Andrew gets to play and relax as he works out his fingering.  I thought that this would be a perfect release after work.  I was right.

Andrew has been practicing after dinner.   It's amazing how the children suddenly all sit and imaginatively play when the piano music begins.  Here is Andrew on the piano right after we had it tuned.  In time, it will all come back to him. I am sure he will be embarrassed to know I posted him fiddling. But I love to hear him practice.

I think this piece is the perfect expression of why Andrew needs a piano.  This is the musical expression of what is going on in his head at all times. (Bach - Prelude & Fugue in C minor.  First part is the Prelude and the second part is the Fugue)

This piece is just beautiful and we both love it.

Relish the Little Children

Sisters - I love when the kids all get along and show their love for each other.  They really do care about each other and enjoy each other.  But obviously, as I have posted before they pick at each other too, which is so sad (http://theclaytonianchronicle.blogspot.com/2009/08/mama-always-said-be-nice-to-your.html)  I just pray that as they mature, they learn to be friends before adulthood.

My Little Afternoon Helper - For whatever reason, Alex has decided to do this chore in the afternoon.  Every afternoon before I make dinner, I wash up all the kid cups and put any other dishes in the dishwasher.  Alex has watched me do this and say to him, "Not right now, Honey, Mommy's got to wash these dishes and tidy up."  So one day he told me he would do this "chore."  He makes a watery mess and has a lot of fun.  I love it.  It does free me up a bit.

All Glory to God - I love how children think.  I often catch Kristiana rearranging figurines as though they were alive.  Yesterday, she rearranged this figurine of the Holy Family so that it looks as though they are giving praise to the Icons.

Little Confessions

My mommy blogger, friend, Kayleen, has made a call for little confessions on her blog.  Not big confessions needing reconciliation, but ones that can be atoned otherwise.  I have always wanted to do this and have not gotten around to it.  In the same vein, I have always wanted to do a pet peeves blog.

• For instance, nothing gets my goat more than when someone tries to tell me how I am feeling.  They are usually wrong and it usually is meant to be hurtful.  I have funny eyebrows, okay. They don't always express my mood.

• My master bathroom has not been cleaned in far too long, and I invite people over in order to force myself to clean the other bathroom and tidy up our living area.  (You thought I invited you over because I wanted to see you. That is only half the truth. I'm a bad lady.)

• I have to wipe off all the kitchen counters before going to bed at night or I feel crazy, depressed and disheveled in the morning.

• Often I feed the kids lunch while the youngest is sleeping.  Instead of making her her own lunch when she wakes, she eats the leftovers of the older kids.

• Sometimes on the weekends, I let my kids watch TV for 5 or more hours.  You do what you have to survive.  Babysitters don't come free and I am already paying for the TV.

• Recently, I have started more books than I have finished.  I wish my time and mental capacity were greater.

• My kids hear my stern/mean mommy voice more than I would like during the day.  I wish I was better at talking to them/correcting them like Michelle Duggar in a sweet, soft voice.  Though, I am not sure my kids would be able to hear me over all the ruckus.

• I feel like my life is so full of just my immediate family, I do not have time to be caring and concerned toward others on a regular basis.  I do care, but do not have time to express it. :-(

• I am not a very precise sort of person.  I am a "it's good enough" type person.  I only seek to achieve the facade of being perfect, or not so perfect.  I guess I'll never be the best.  I know that's very obtuse, but it applies to almost everything in my life.  It's very hard to be balanced perfectly on all sides.

• Yes, I think my kids are cuter than yours.  What can I say, I am biased.  I know what's best for them too. ;-)

• My husband and I have hardly slept in the same bed all month (or really since we went to Washington in December).  A lot of the time he goes and tends to one of the children in the night and he falls asleep in their beds and stays.  He's good like that.   But, I sure do miss him.

I guess that's enough for now.  I could do this once a week every week.

 

Just thought I would throw in a preggy pic (can't have a blog without a pic).  Not that anyone cares what you look like when you're having your fourth child in six years.  I'm big, k, but still cute.  I think pregnant women are cute.  I took this picture myself by putting the camera on the dresser and setting the timer.

 

Where's The Peace Button?

I talked to another mommy friend.  She is always willing to lend an ear.  She is more experience and wiser.  I would call her more often if she, or I had more time, but such is life.  She gave some GREAT advice today.

I was calling her about five year old boys.  Recently, I have been talking to friends about their five year old boys.  It seems that they are all experiencing similar situations with their five year old boys.  Which led me to wonder if this is simply a phase, even though I view it to be my son's personality.  So I called to inquire about my friend's boys when they were five.  She is a homeschooling mother of six children, so she ought have some insight.  I asked if her boys were like this when they were five.  She said that they were a lot shyer and she was a lot sterner.  She does not put up with anything.  But her boys went to school when they were that age and then the boys requested to do home school.

She digressed, that children will always be testing their limits.  They are not trying to push your buttons.  They are trying to find the boundaries.  If you do not firmly let them know where they are, they will push it.  Not knowing where the boundaries are, they will not feel as secure in the world.  But don't take offense to their tests.

I feel more at peace with this answer.  Actually, I have been a lot more at peace with this week and I feel a lot more productive.  In general, my mood feels more stable and it seems that the fish oil I have added to my diet is helping.  Or maybe I have just come over some hormonal hill and this rough patch is now passed me.

It has now been two weeks that Alex has refused all "home school" lessons.  I guess my aforementioned friend would simply get stern and make him mind.  However, my son is five and stubborn.  He does not just lie down and roll over when I get stern.  When I reason with him (insomuch as tots are capable), I do get some results.  It runs in the family to be turned off something forever with one bad experience.  I do not want him hating school, and learning, and me teaching him at five years old.  So I try to play it cool and use child-psychology of which I know very little.  But it turns out a lot of it is intuitive.  As in, show people love and respect and you will be able to work things out, most of the time.  So this week, after deciding that he is going to kindergarten outside of the home next year, I have played it very cool with him (this has brought me peace as well).  And you know what, his desire to learn has not decreased.  He just has to be the instigator of it.  So we HAVE done a lot of learning without school books and worksheets.  This makes me a little sad, because my current home school plan is out of the question.

I have picked up some more books on home schooling from the library.  I have not really been interested in Montessori, but I picked up the handbook.  We will see.  I could see myself doing some sort of combo of Montessori and something else.  But, I do not really know anything about Montessori in depth.  As someone who came through conventional schooling, this is what I know and am inclined to desire conventional lessons, perhaps with some life skills lessons littered here and there.  I just have to think about how to creatively teach Alex without doing it under the guises of "this is a home school lesson."  Which puts me out of my comfort zone unsure of whether I can do this, despite my desire to homeschool.  All along I have said, I can do this if some curriculum program spells it out for me.

Still praying about it and trying to surrender it all to our Maker.

After Alex worked with the pattern blocks he wanted to make his own pattern - a pyramid with different color levels

Kristiana's lesson - shapes and letters

Annie's home school lesson - cups and lids

Imagination Land

Today, Alex and Kristiana each got a box to play in.  Their little faces lit up when they saw them and they immediately hopped in.  They seemed so comforted by getting inside.

What is it about a box that is so entertaining to kids?

I used to love playing in boxes.  I tried to remember what I loved about them so much.  At first I thought that perhaps it was personal space.  It does provide a barrier between one and the outside world.  If you close up the top, you are all alone and no one can see what you are doing.  Perhaps being inside a box reminds them of being in the womb subconsciously.

But, it probably has a lot to do with imagination too.  A box can become anything one imagines.  The possibilities are limitless.  I noticed over Christmas someone actually did decide to market and sell boxes as children's entertainment.  They were large boxes with scenes, or playhouse printed on the outside and they could be colored.  However, I think that they probably did not sell a lot.  Aside from being an overpriced box, they were printed on, which immediately eliminates the imagination part.  Nothing beats a good old-fashioned, plain, cardboard box.

 

Ambivalent

I am feeling ambivalent about today.  If somehow I could calculate the goodness of the day, I would say it turned out well.  However, it felt trying...

I stayed up late last night washing all the laundry so that today I would only need to fold it and put it away.  I had to stay up especially late because I accidentally forgot to put the clothes in once and the machine ran empty.  I was pretty tired last night too.  I knew that if all the laundry were washed it would help to make this day feel less strenuous.  All this to say, when I started this day early this morning I was working off six hours of sleep and I expected I would be crashing at some point in the afternoon.  Surprisingly, I kept up all day long.

I prayed with the kids this morning. Success! It's not easy praying with three preschoolers, or even to get them all to the prayer corner all at once.  It was a struggle to get them all dressed prior to prayers.  Afterward, I figured I would put on a little music while they played and I would work on a few chores.  But Alex had another idea, instead of regularly planned homeschool lessons the kids listened to a CD of Aesop's Fables.  Alex came to me in the middle and said they all needed popcorn to eat while they listened.  I thought that was a great idea.  At least it was a great idea until Alex finished his popcorn before the girls and then stole Kristiana's popcorn bowl and she melted into a fit and kicked popcorn all over the room.

We went to the grocery store and Alex and Kristiana had an affectionate, playful, fight all through the store.  Kisses and pokes and boisterous giggling, which would sometimes digress into scratches and tears.  It was sort of cute, but also extremely annoying and embarrassing.  They fought enough to not get any sort of reward at the end of the trip.

Lunch happened next.  I put away the food and doled out freshly bought vittles.  I let the kids watch T.V. for a couple of hours while I caught up on a little work.  But, before that time was over Annie awoke from her nap wheezing.  I laid down with her a little while in hopes she would fall back asleep, but she was struggling to breath too much.  So I got her up and she cried for a couple of hours while I tried to make her comfortable.  I finally gave her a breathing treatment and tylenol and then she was ready for more fun.

I tried to get Alex to read aloud this afternoon, but he gave me heck about it.  That is about the time I got fed up and said to myself he is going to school next year, because I cannot go through this daily refusal to learn just because I asked him to do it.  It's not good for anyone in this situation.  We are going to have to try to make tuition for Catholic school.  Besides with a new baby in the house, we are going to need a little extra time to spend with the girls.

The children then played outside in the chilly, but mild January weather for hours.  Alex got constructive bringing playroom furniture outside and up to the top of the play house.  Hey, it kept him busy and it only took ten gummy bears to get him to put it all back before dinner.

I guess what made the day stressful at points was all the picking and bickering the kids did.  For some reason Kristiana was malicious toward Annie today.  She would push her down and kick her for no reason.  I caught her smothering Annie under a bean bag.  I don't understand.  Maybe she just wanted to see what would happen.  It's just hard and taxing having to discipline and break up fights consistently all day long.  Plus, I take it so personally when they treat each other badly.  I am sure they are not thinking conscientiously.

However, in retrospect it was a pretty good day.  The kids went to bed on time.  Alex did learn despite not sitting down for a homeschool lesson.  We talked all about the calendar before his bedtime story.  Everyone got fed and tended to. The laundry and the shopping are done.  I just want everyone to get along.

Today's Precious Moments, with Hashtags

I don't have a Twitter account, but I think hashtags are funny, cute and clever (What are hashtags?).  So I am writing this post with hashtags.

• After a long wait, friends Anne and Taylor are getting to adopt their little girl! They just have to wait 30 more days.  #GodisGood, dreamscometrue, happydance

• Listened to our five year old son read two stories to his sisters. #successandpatience

• Pushed the kids on the swings for a half hour and listened to their giggles of joy. #nicesunnyweather

• Hubby made dinner and it tasted great. #secretmasterchef

• Received a dozen sweet, soft, and not at all sloppy, kisses, intermittently throughout the evening from our three year old daughter. #thankheavenforlittlegirls

• Held baby girl's hand as she fell asleep in her crib. #sleepbyyourselfbygolly

• As I wrote this post, Lucy kicked so hard I saw my belly rise up. #stronghealthybabyonherway

  

 

Play With Us

Blackberry Snack

A Nurturing Slide

A Dangerous Boy

Loving Cuddles for a Precious Moment - Then Back to Hitting.

Baby Lucy

Icon Army

As I mentioned in previous posts, we recently painted our great room.  I have been slowly re-hanging all our wall-hangings.  I have begun to re-distribute some icons around the house.  This is pleasing to have heavenly windows throughout the house.  Last night, I re-organized and re-hung our icons, which serve as our prayer corner.  Our prayer corner is really an easterly facing wall.  I like this location of the prayer corner,  because it is the first thing people will see when they come into our home sending a clear message of our beliefs and it faces our open kitchen where we spend a lot of time, can easily view the wall and remember our connection to God.

I asked my husband to assist me in putting this area back together, but he was also running interference with the children.  I hung the icons as I did the previous time.  I added a couple of new icons and moved some others.  When I was finished my husband came into the room and said, "Why are all our icons lined up like little soldiers?"

I chuckled and asked him if he wanted me to change it.  He said, no and said he just thought it looked strange.  I told him that this is how I had done it before just with different icons.  I put them this way, because they are all at eye-level of the average adult hobbit.   Plus it does look nice and orderly, and what is God if not Ultimate Order.

Eventually, when money grows on trees, I would like to add some nice chest or hutch, where we could store both religious books and music as well as have a place to set up incense and candles.  This area is not child-friendly for candles and incense as is.  I would also like to add two nice reading chairs so that one could easily sit and read the Holy Word of God or other spiritual type reading.

How you arrange the space in your home and the things you hang on your wall speak volumes not only about want is important to you but also who you want to become.  If you don't have a suitable place to pray, you will not.  I truly appreciate the Eastern theology of icons and am grateful to have these treasures in our home.

 

A Venerable Name and Eventful Week

This has been such an eventful week. On the weekend we painted the large main room in our house.  We painted it a color called "Light Incense."  It is such a fitting color for the Clayton house.  It is a light creamy, yellowish color.  It lightened up the big room and we are pleased.

We have this little room that is supposed to be a dining room, but we use it as a play room.  It sits open just off of our great room.  We wanted to paint this room a different and more dramatic color as an accent to the rest of the house.  We were torn on the color, because our kitchen also sits open to the main great room and it is green.

I diverge--this is such a first world problem.  These are troubles of having an open floor plan and an ample home.  It's not a huge house, but I feel it's enough that we could raise a large family here happily.

Anyhow, we chose a color for our little room called "Cork."  It was a golden, bronzy color.  It sort of reminded me of the gold one sees in reproduction Icons.  One afternoon I painted the little room myself with a three year old and five year old apprentices.  I swear I spent more time cleaning after them than I did painting.  When my husband came home, he looked in the room and said it look orange.  Then he got very grumpy.  It did look orange.  It had dried a very tangerine color.  We had bought a sample paint and tested it on the wall.  We did not know how we had made such a mistake.  It was so overwhelming.  It was just too much.  We spent a couple days pondering what to do.  We finally bought more "Light Incense."  Everyone felt happy sand calm again.  I guess we are just vanilla type people and that's okay.

I really want to but a few more large prints for our walls.  But there are sooo many other things we need to purchase.  Shoes, a new blanket, a carseat for the new baby, more cloth diapers, more homeschool materials…Someday.  I know good things come to those who wait.

After a week of collecting supplies, I have finally begun the icon writing process.  I have decided to do six copies of the same icon for our Godchildren and friends.  It is simple and small so I am hoping to achieve this feat before Easter.  It is my practice to send something to the Godchildren at Easter.  This week I have gessoed my icons.  Next week, I hope to get them traced and maybe paint the cartoon.  I just need to keep moving on it and not get bogged down in the magnitude and length of the project.

I think I am doing all right on the New Year's Resolutions.  Rome was not built in a day, right?  I started working on icons.  I sat outside for 1h30 today while the kids watched a movie for their quiet time and I just gessoed and prayed.  It was nice.  The kids have stopped watching T.V. first thing in the morning.  So they are watching a lot less T.V.  My answer to that was to simply get up early before them and wake myself up so that I was ready to make them breakfast and get them going on their morning activity.  They have not seemed to miss it.  I have not had as much patience with the children as I had hoped.  It seems like I am always putting out fires and I am not always so quick on my feet to think of the best and calm resolution to whatever is going on.  My kids seem to violate every BIG No-No behaviors daily.  I do not know why they think their behavior is acceptable when I constantly remind them of how to be respectful.  I constantly remind them of the golden rule to help them understand why their behavior is unacceptable.  The big no-no's are biting, hitting, respecting each other's space and they are obsessed with saying the words for private parts and bodily functions (it's their toilet humor and they run around giggling).  I have been praying more, but not like I had hoped in my resolution.  I am working on it though.  We have been eating better and that is largely due to not eating holiday food anymore.  And I joined a gym, finally.  I have had the membership a little over a week and I have gone five times.  The kids love going and having a little play time outside the house too.

Now for kid updates:

Alex has fought me every morning on doing his home school lessons.  He is so defiant.  He wants to play.  He wants to do anything, but his school work.  I do not ask him to do much.  I do not ask him to do something that is above his age.  The lessons are enjoyable.  Eventually, each morning he decides to sit down and he enjoys the work and gets it done quickly.  Usually, I announce that if he does not want me to be his teacher and do his home school work, then he will have to go to public school six hours a day.  He immediately straightens up and does the work.  He definitely wants to do home school.  But, why does he give me such hassle in the morning.  One morning this week I was near tears.  Home schooling just makes sense to me and we want this for our children.  They say they want it too.  But, I cannot go through this battle everyday.  I know this is his personality.  I have known that he is this intense since he was in the womb.  I just need to find a way to work with him better.  When I ask him to do his home school, I need him to sit down and do it.  He is a great kid, loving and we really get along well, except he likes to be his own boss and I understand that.  I just have to figure out how to let him be his own boss while still getting stuff done.

Kristiana gave up her pacifier this week.  We were going to the store and I told her that she could pick out a special toy if she gave up her pacifier forever.  She agreed.  We packed up her pacis and went to the store.  She picked her toy and paid for it with the pacis.  From that moment on she understood that she was done with pacis.  She did not ask for the pacifier the rest of the day.  She did mention that she just wanted to see Annie's pacis at bed time.  Then she went to be bed without any fuss.  She has not tried to take Annie's paci like I expected either.   She has been without it for days now and she is still fine.  Although, we have heard a lot more screaming from this little girl lately.  She has one less coping device and so when she gets frustrated, she just screams and screams.  Her first reaction to anything that troubles her is to scream or whine.  I am working hard to help her react by communicating her frustrations better .  Poor baby girl still has fluid in her ear as well.  The doctor's office has not called me back, but I am thinking she will be getting a tube in her ear very soon.  This will probably help her communication and touchiness.

Annie thinks she is just as big as the other kids.  It has been really amazing to see her blossom from baby to little girl.  She has been sleeping in a big bed and sitting in a booster chair.  She babbles at us like she is really talking.  I say babble, but I am pretty sure she is trying to say real things.  She definitely understands a lot of what we are saying to her.  She plays like the other kids.  When they sit down to color, she tries to color on paper too.  I took her to a gymnastics gym free play and she did not want to play in the toddler area.  She played with the big kids.  She hung on the bar and swung.  She toddled on the balance beam.  They have a long trampoline to run on and she waited in line and ran down it.  It was hilarious to see a baby act like a big kid and do it with skill.  She wore me out.  She is so sure-footed.  But, this does not surprise me.  Alex and Kristiana were just the same.  When Kristiana was Annie's age she was scaling the big kid play ground with speed and agility.

Baby #4 is 25 weeks gestation and growing.  I felt pretty good and STRONG this week, because I went to the gym.  I am just as happy and excited about this baby as the rest, but I am more at ease with my 5 years and 4 babies worth of experience.  In other news, Baby #4 has a name.  We are pretty settled on it.  It came to us very naturally as did the other kids.  It is a name we have long considered and the right child has come along to receive it.  I asked the kids what they would like to name the baby and after they came up with some silly names like, "Thunder Go Awesome," they asked me to list a few.  After hearing the list, they picked one.  They were pretty certain of the name choice.  Once Alex makes up his mind, no one can change it.  We are going to call our little girl, Lucy Macaria (St. Macarius and Greek for blessed).  I really wanted her first name to be Macaria.  But I could not sell my husband on it (or anyone else, but he's the only one who counts).  We all love Lucy.  Kristiana can't wait to call her Lulu.

Oh, was that too much to read?  Well, I know some will just want to skip to this next part, and I don't blame you.  A few snapshots from the week.

Look! We discovered how to get Alex to eat vegetables.  
It's called, "Green Slime Smoothie."  Alex saw it on Allrecipes.com while I was looking for recipes for our weekly menu.  
He had to try it.  It consists of strawberries, bananas, yogurt and spinach.

Two months ago, Alex was given a fast food kids meal toy (blue bird on the right) while I was at my insurance agent's office.  
This week he asked if we could get more of these toys.  They're called Dino Tots.  He calls them Dino Tops, because they only have a top.  
I said that I am sure the fast food place did not have the toys anymore.  But we decided to make a TyrannoTot out of felt.  I made the dino on the left one afternoon this week.

Here is proof that we painted our house and that Annie thinks she is older and bigger than she is.
She speedily, scaled this 8 foot ladder all by herself .  Daddy spotted for safety measures.  
But, she was so quick he almost did not get there in time for her to make it to the top.  Crazy kid.

The Important, Ordinary Day

Woke up this morning and went to pray.  As usual a few minutes later one of the children joined me and curled up in my lap.  Monday it was Annie; Tuesday was Alex and today was Kristiana.  When the kids sit in my lap I feel distracted and rushed, but I am glad I am getting this time to pray anyway.  All the children were awake and hungry minutes after I finished praying.  I kept thinking I need to get a shower, but had things to attend to.  Around 8:00 a.m. my husband woke up and asked me what time Kristiana's ear doctor appointment was.  "Oh! I completely forgot.  Thank you, honey! It's at 8:30!"  So I jumped in the shower and asked my husband to help the kids get on their shoes.  We were out the door ten minutes after my husband had initially alerted me and showed up on time.

At the doctor we had to wait a long time, because their computers were down.  Oh boy! I questioned whether it was right of them to make everyone wait so long or if they should reschedule some people.  It was very difficult to corral three preschool aged kids in an inhospitable place for so long.  But we finally saw the doctor, which I was grateful for and it did seem like they were trying really hard to keep things moving.  By the time the doctor came in to see us Annie was bored to tears and had trouble not fussing and screaming.  It was hard to converse with the doctor.  He said one of Kristiana's eardrums did not look good, but was not a candidate for a tube yet.  The other ear already has a tube.  I asked if it did not look good because she was just getting over a cold or if it just did not look healthy in general.  He said it just did not look healthy.  There was no fluid behind it and it was vibrating normally, but not healthy looking.  Later that day she complained about ear pain, which now I have to call back and ask if it could be infected.  Poor girl.

After the long time at the doctor's office, I decided to run some errands.  We went to Michaels to pick up a birthday present, but it turned into a more expensive trip than I anticipated.  I really need to be more strict with myself and what I intend to spend when I go into stores like this.  You would laugh at me if you really knew how little I spent and the fact that I am complaining.  But, I did not go in there thinking I would spend that much.

Then I went to a gym and signed up for a gym membership.  Now I have no more excuses, I have to go get exercise.  I am paying for it after all.  Or what I am really paying for is the childcare, which is wonderfully reasonable when you consider you get childcare and a top fitness facility.  My children played in the kids area while I signed up for membership and loved it.  They loved it when I took them to the YMCA in Washington over the summer.  After they played at the Washington Y, they were rewarded by getting to play in the pool afterward, but they will not have that same great kids pool now.  I have a feeling they will tire of this kids place quickly.  But, I am going to ride out their enthusiasm while it lasts.

We finally made it home at lunchtime.  Annie was asleep.  She has been having lots of trouble sleeping on her own since our holiday travels.  But, today I laid her down and she slept for two hours.  It was a much needed rest for her and mommy.

I made myself and the other kids lunch and they watched television for a couple of hours.  In the meantime, I checked my email and Facebook.  Then I worked on my Mother's Rule.  This Rule is my schedule/rule that allows me to serve God and the five P's of life best (Prayer, Person, Partner, Parent, Provider).  I am still working on reading "A Mother's Rule of Life."  I took a break to do some other reading.  Now I feel I need to complete this book and refine my Rule.  I hope this Rule will suit my family as well, because parts of it I will need their cooperation--like for attending family prayer, chores, getting dressed in the morning and so forth.  I like how this book emphasizes self-awareness and serving God first.

After our long lunch break, I asked the kids to clean up their toys because friends were coming over and it's much nicer to play in an area that is cleaned up and organized.  They agreed and promptly moved the toys they wanted to play with to a clean open space in the house and began to play.  Smart kids, but not exactly what I had in mind.  Nevertheless, they were quietly and creatively playing.  So I decided to tidy their play area, which I knew I was going to help them with anyway, and just let them play.

While I was tidying the toys, my mom called to see how I was doing and to suggest names for our baby.  I told her that I did not think that we would name our baby any of the names she suggested.  None of them really hit me.  But, I am open to hearing name, because you never know when you will hear the perfect name.  I mentioned that the kids had already picked a name they liked for the baby.  And she immediately said she did not like it.  I explained that Andrew and I liked it too and it was a name we had considered before.  Then she was so bold to say that we should choose a name that was aesthetically pleasing.  It was a stab to the heart.  Of all the rude things to say.  It did not occur to her that when I said WE LIKED the name that we felt it was aesthetically pleasing and she should be respectful of a name we liked.  (I should mention that the name is not unusual or harsh to the ear).  Yes, fire rained down from there.  It was not a civil conversation from that point on.  I took a jab back at what she had named me.  She of course did not like my jab and was offended by my accusation that perhaps my name was not the most aesthetically pleasing choice.  But, at least she knew what it felt like when she had said what she said to me.  This is my child to name after all, and I promised it will be a tasteful, holy name.  Say what you will about my name, but no one ever pronounced it right at first glance.  It was hard to say at loud gatherings.  But, eventually I grew to love my name and owned the identity for myself.

Finally, friends came over and we all visited and played.  Things got crazy.  Sometimes I worry that my children lack social graces.  It may be because of their age or may be because every thing your own children do seems so much worse, and everyone else's children seem perfectly, well-behaved, which they would tell you otherwise.  It was not my finest dinner soiree and I am so embarrassed at my service.  There was a lot of "it's okay" said.  Fortunately, the people we were visiting with are like family and it really is okay to be a little embarrassing amongst people you are so close with.

Everyone was exhausted at the end of the day and crashed after a short clean up.  This included my husband.  And I am sitting up late into the night logging my day.  I cannot tell you why it seemed so important to log this day of all days.  It seems every day is busy and eventful.  I do not know what I would do with myself if my life were not so full.  I am so very grateful to be graced in this way--Good and loving God, perfect husband, beautiful children, good healthcare, money in our pockets, time for oneself, prosperous decisions, a bounty to tidy, amazing friends to share our bread. Wow, is all I have to say.

I do not know how they ended up like this, but I just had to take a picture.  
I think Annie just came and sat on Kristiana who was lying on the floor fussing.

Isn't She Lovely?

I am in love with this sweet face.  We did not get 3D ultrasound pictures of the other kids because they all had their faces hidden.  But, this is quite something.  Technology is AMAZING.  We have a lot to be thankful for.  Our baby is totally healthy and beautiful.  We now know that our fourth child is a girl.  This is much to our son's chagrin.  He had a big meltdown that he would not have a brother.  We explained to him that it was good to be the only son, because it meant special one on one father-son time with Daddy.  My husband was a little worried too.  As he told the ultrasound technician, "You don't understand. Our daughters are really beautiful and I think we are all in a lot of trouble."  Then of course, he worried about paying for weddings and or a dowry to a religious order.  But, I said we just need to teach our daughters to sew and bake cakes and arrange flowers and all the sisters can help with each others weddings.  This is a good thing to have three girls in a row.

Festive New Year's Child

7 Quick Takes - 2012 New Year's Resolutions

In the past I have said I don't like New Year's Resolutions.  In my opinion, making a resolution is a guarantee to fail, because it is puts undue pressure on oneself.   Plus, if you want to improve yourself, just do it.  No "resolution" is needed.  I am not saying it will not be difficult.  We can all improve, right?  Here I go again, making resolutions against my own principles that I should not--Baring all my weaknesses here.  But, I am going to take this not so much as a resolution, but rather things I could improve upon.

Here are my suggestions for myself, so I can be better in 2012:

1. Pray. Pray formally, in private, without failing, twice a day, and pray formally with the family twice a day.  Along with prayer at meal times that will make seven times a day--a holy number.  Every time my routine changes a little, it is difficult to keep prayer consistent.

2. Exercise three times a week--Join a gym with childcare!  I think about getting exercise all the time, but unless I can get away from the kids, it's not going to happen.  I also feel bad about leaving them with my husband when he gets off work, because he has already had a long day and me too.  It would be better if I could go earlier in the day and have someone keep the kids.

3. Eat better - In line with the previous resolution, eat smaller, controlled portion sizes and only eat when I really feel hungry.  Delicious holiday food is really hard to eat moderately.  I always get to thinking I need to watch portions during this time. ;-)

4. T.V. Habits - Stop allowing the children to watch so much T.V. - Stop using the T.V. as a crutch.  Usually the kids watch T.V. first thing in the morning before everyone is ready to do anything else.  And they watch T.V. around lunch time while I put the baby down for a nap.  The T.V. is the only thing that keeps them quiet and occupied while I lay her down and she falls asleep.  Then I let them watch for an hour or so and I get time to make lunch for everyone and eat my own lunch in peace.  But, I would like to see them go more days without T.V. at all, or only during quiet time.  I would like to figure out what to do with the kids when I need them to be quiet.

5. Date my husband.  I really miss one-on-one time with my best friend.  I could spend every minute of every day with him and never be tired of him. :-)  As it is, we spend a lot of time with each other, but hardly ever without the kids.  Therefore, much of the time we are together we are pre-occupied and stressed.  We need some stress free time together.

6. Quiet time with God--Write an Icon that is not a child's icon.  This longing never goes away.  I guess I need to spend less time on the computer, or something.  Perhaps all those books I am reading will have to wait a little longer.

7. Patience without yelling, anger or spanking, even when I am tired, stressed and not feeling well.  Alex is older and can be reasoned with, I have seen a lot of improvement in behavior by remaining calm and working through whatever behavior problem.  I need to be conscientious about how I treat ALL the people in my life.  I need to treat everyone with kindness, gentleness, respect and cheer.  These are the traits I am trying to teach my children.

With a lot of these I need my husband's cooperation and support.  I think I have an important conversation forthcoming with my other half.

 

 

 

 

 

The Nativity Project

It's finally done.  A friend asked me to help her make Nativity figures so that she could sew a plush Nativity set that her kids could play with, without breaking.  I drew the figures and she is having them printed on fabric and will sew them.  I took my drawings and laminated them and the kids painted a cave.  Then we placed the figures as though it were a Nativity set.  I laminated the figures so we can reuse them from year to year.

Kristiana was my big helper.  She worked the longest and hardest on it.

This time Annie helped paint.  She finger painted. :-)

This is one of my favorite parts of the set - the two angels and the star.

Happy Christmas Season!

S'nami Boh - God is With Us

Christ is Born! Glorify Him!

As much as l love the truly unique food which helps to commemorate Christmas Eve, Holy Supper celebrations, this year I really enjoyed the fellowship celebrating the meal with our whole church.

Folks brought their cheer and their finest cooking skills.  We began by eating blessed garlic dipped in honey commemorating the bitter sweetness of life.  This was followed by a wonderful meatless meal.  Cedar plank salmon, pyrohies (potato stuffed pasta), kutya (honey and wheat porridge), kapusta (sauerkraut and peas), fruit, cabbage slaw, mushroom soup, stuffed cabbage and bread.  I did not take pictures of any of the food.  I was so excited about it, I was eager to make it disappear into my belly!

All of the children present were very adorable and squirmy.  One person told us their children were with a babysitter.  While we think it is important for the children to be present, the 30th time the toddler wants to be picked up, then put down, then runs up the aisle, you start to think a babysitter for evening Liturgies is a VERY good idea. ;-)

I made braided cheese bread for the priests for Christmas.  I was particularly pleased by the results, because totally winged it.  I did not have a recipe and I made tasty bread!  This is a big accomplishment, because I am not a baker.

This is Sister Vitae.  She was one of the kids who was in the youth group I lead.  
We have not seen her since our wedding nearly 7 years ago.  A lot has changed since then.

P.S. I think my camera is on it way out.  It does not seem to be focusing well anymore.  It's only three years old. :-(