Imagination Land

Today, Alex and Kristiana each got a box to play in.  Their little faces lit up when they saw them and they immediately hopped in.  They seemed so comforted by getting inside.

What is it about a box that is so entertaining to kids?

I used to love playing in boxes.  I tried to remember what I loved about them so much.  At first I thought that perhaps it was personal space.  It does provide a barrier between one and the outside world.  If you close up the top, you are all alone and no one can see what you are doing.  Perhaps being inside a box reminds them of being in the womb subconsciously.

But, it probably has a lot to do with imagination too.  A box can become anything one imagines.  The possibilities are limitless.  I noticed over Christmas someone actually did decide to market and sell boxes as children's entertainment.  They were large boxes with scenes, or playhouse printed on the outside and they could be colored.  However, I think that they probably did not sell a lot.  Aside from being an overpriced box, they were printed on, which immediately eliminates the imagination part.  Nothing beats a good old-fashioned, plain, cardboard box.

 

Ambivalent

I am feeling ambivalent about today.  If somehow I could calculate the goodness of the day, I would say it turned out well.  However, it felt trying...

I stayed up late last night washing all the laundry so that today I would only need to fold it and put it away.  I had to stay up especially late because I accidentally forgot to put the clothes in once and the machine ran empty.  I was pretty tired last night too.  I knew that if all the laundry were washed it would help to make this day feel less strenuous.  All this to say, when I started this day early this morning I was working off six hours of sleep and I expected I would be crashing at some point in the afternoon.  Surprisingly, I kept up all day long.

I prayed with the kids this morning. Success! It's not easy praying with three preschoolers, or even to get them all to the prayer corner all at once.  It was a struggle to get them all dressed prior to prayers.  Afterward, I figured I would put on a little music while they played and I would work on a few chores.  But Alex had another idea, instead of regularly planned homeschool lessons the kids listened to a CD of Aesop's Fables.  Alex came to me in the middle and said they all needed popcorn to eat while they listened.  I thought that was a great idea.  At least it was a great idea until Alex finished his popcorn before the girls and then stole Kristiana's popcorn bowl and she melted into a fit and kicked popcorn all over the room.

We went to the grocery store and Alex and Kristiana had an affectionate, playful, fight all through the store.  Kisses and pokes and boisterous giggling, which would sometimes digress into scratches and tears.  It was sort of cute, but also extremely annoying and embarrassing.  They fought enough to not get any sort of reward at the end of the trip.

Lunch happened next.  I put away the food and doled out freshly bought vittles.  I let the kids watch T.V. for a couple of hours while I caught up on a little work.  But, before that time was over Annie awoke from her nap wheezing.  I laid down with her a little while in hopes she would fall back asleep, but she was struggling to breath too much.  So I got her up and she cried for a couple of hours while I tried to make her comfortable.  I finally gave her a breathing treatment and tylenol and then she was ready for more fun.

I tried to get Alex to read aloud this afternoon, but he gave me heck about it.  That is about the time I got fed up and said to myself he is going to school next year, because I cannot go through this daily refusal to learn just because I asked him to do it.  It's not good for anyone in this situation.  We are going to have to try to make tuition for Catholic school.  Besides with a new baby in the house, we are going to need a little extra time to spend with the girls.

The children then played outside in the chilly, but mild January weather for hours.  Alex got constructive bringing playroom furniture outside and up to the top of the play house.  Hey, it kept him busy and it only took ten gummy bears to get him to put it all back before dinner.

I guess what made the day stressful at points was all the picking and bickering the kids did.  For some reason Kristiana was malicious toward Annie today.  She would push her down and kick her for no reason.  I caught her smothering Annie under a bean bag.  I don't understand.  Maybe she just wanted to see what would happen.  It's just hard and taxing having to discipline and break up fights consistently all day long.  Plus, I take it so personally when they treat each other badly.  I am sure they are not thinking conscientiously.

However, in retrospect it was a pretty good day.  The kids went to bed on time.  Alex did learn despite not sitting down for a homeschool lesson.  We talked all about the calendar before his bedtime story.  Everyone got fed and tended to. The laundry and the shopping are done.  I just want everyone to get along.

Today's Precious Moments, with Hashtags

I don't have a Twitter account, but I think hashtags are funny, cute and clever (What are hashtags?).  So I am writing this post with hashtags.

• After a long wait, friends Anne and Taylor are getting to adopt their little girl! They just have to wait 30 more days.  #GodisGood, dreamscometrue, happydance

• Listened to our five year old son read two stories to his sisters. #successandpatience

• Pushed the kids on the swings for a half hour and listened to their giggles of joy. #nicesunnyweather

• Hubby made dinner and it tasted great. #secretmasterchef

• Received a dozen sweet, soft, and not at all sloppy, kisses, intermittently throughout the evening from our three year old daughter. #thankheavenforlittlegirls

• Held baby girl's hand as she fell asleep in her crib. #sleepbyyourselfbygolly

• As I wrote this post, Lucy kicked so hard I saw my belly rise up. #stronghealthybabyonherway

  

 

Play With Us

Blackberry Snack

A Nurturing Slide

A Dangerous Boy

Loving Cuddles for a Precious Moment - Then Back to Hitting.

Baby Lucy

Icon Army

As I mentioned in previous posts, we recently painted our great room.  I have been slowly re-hanging all our wall-hangings.  I have begun to re-distribute some icons around the house.  This is pleasing to have heavenly windows throughout the house.  Last night, I re-organized and re-hung our icons, which serve as our prayer corner.  Our prayer corner is really an easterly facing wall.  I like this location of the prayer corner,  because it is the first thing people will see when they come into our home sending a clear message of our beliefs and it faces our open kitchen where we spend a lot of time, can easily view the wall and remember our connection to God.

I asked my husband to assist me in putting this area back together, but he was also running interference with the children.  I hung the icons as I did the previous time.  I added a couple of new icons and moved some others.  When I was finished my husband came into the room and said, "Why are all our icons lined up like little soldiers?"

I chuckled and asked him if he wanted me to change it.  He said, no and said he just thought it looked strange.  I told him that this is how I had done it before just with different icons.  I put them this way, because they are all at eye-level of the average adult hobbit.   Plus it does look nice and orderly, and what is God if not Ultimate Order.

Eventually, when money grows on trees, I would like to add some nice chest or hutch, where we could store both religious books and music as well as have a place to set up incense and candles.  This area is not child-friendly for candles and incense as is.  I would also like to add two nice reading chairs so that one could easily sit and read the Holy Word of God or other spiritual type reading.

How you arrange the space in your home and the things you hang on your wall speak volumes not only about want is important to you but also who you want to become.  If you don't have a suitable place to pray, you will not.  I truly appreciate the Eastern theology of icons and am grateful to have these treasures in our home.

 

A Venerable Name and Eventful Week

This has been such an eventful week. On the weekend we painted the large main room in our house.  We painted it a color called "Light Incense."  It is such a fitting color for the Clayton house.  It is a light creamy, yellowish color.  It lightened up the big room and we are pleased.

We have this little room that is supposed to be a dining room, but we use it as a play room.  It sits open just off of our great room.  We wanted to paint this room a different and more dramatic color as an accent to the rest of the house.  We were torn on the color, because our kitchen also sits open to the main great room and it is green.

I diverge--this is such a first world problem.  These are troubles of having an open floor plan and an ample home.  It's not a huge house, but I feel it's enough that we could raise a large family here happily.

Anyhow, we chose a color for our little room called "Cork."  It was a golden, bronzy color.  It sort of reminded me of the gold one sees in reproduction Icons.  One afternoon I painted the little room myself with a three year old and five year old apprentices.  I swear I spent more time cleaning after them than I did painting.  When my husband came home, he looked in the room and said it look orange.  Then he got very grumpy.  It did look orange.  It had dried a very tangerine color.  We had bought a sample paint and tested it on the wall.  We did not know how we had made such a mistake.  It was so overwhelming.  It was just too much.  We spent a couple days pondering what to do.  We finally bought more "Light Incense."  Everyone felt happy sand calm again.  I guess we are just vanilla type people and that's okay.

I really want to but a few more large prints for our walls.  But there are sooo many other things we need to purchase.  Shoes, a new blanket, a carseat for the new baby, more cloth diapers, more homeschool materials…Someday.  I know good things come to those who wait.

After a week of collecting supplies, I have finally begun the icon writing process.  I have decided to do six copies of the same icon for our Godchildren and friends.  It is simple and small so I am hoping to achieve this feat before Easter.  It is my practice to send something to the Godchildren at Easter.  This week I have gessoed my icons.  Next week, I hope to get them traced and maybe paint the cartoon.  I just need to keep moving on it and not get bogged down in the magnitude and length of the project.

I think I am doing all right on the New Year's Resolutions.  Rome was not built in a day, right?  I started working on icons.  I sat outside for 1h30 today while the kids watched a movie for their quiet time and I just gessoed and prayed.  It was nice.  The kids have stopped watching T.V. first thing in the morning.  So they are watching a lot less T.V.  My answer to that was to simply get up early before them and wake myself up so that I was ready to make them breakfast and get them going on their morning activity.  They have not seemed to miss it.  I have not had as much patience with the children as I had hoped.  It seems like I am always putting out fires and I am not always so quick on my feet to think of the best and calm resolution to whatever is going on.  My kids seem to violate every BIG No-No behaviors daily.  I do not know why they think their behavior is acceptable when I constantly remind them of how to be respectful.  I constantly remind them of the golden rule to help them understand why their behavior is unacceptable.  The big no-no's are biting, hitting, respecting each other's space and they are obsessed with saying the words for private parts and bodily functions (it's their toilet humor and they run around giggling).  I have been praying more, but not like I had hoped in my resolution.  I am working on it though.  We have been eating better and that is largely due to not eating holiday food anymore.  And I joined a gym, finally.  I have had the membership a little over a week and I have gone five times.  The kids love going and having a little play time outside the house too.

Now for kid updates:

Alex has fought me every morning on doing his home school lessons.  He is so defiant.  He wants to play.  He wants to do anything, but his school work.  I do not ask him to do much.  I do not ask him to do something that is above his age.  The lessons are enjoyable.  Eventually, each morning he decides to sit down and he enjoys the work and gets it done quickly.  Usually, I announce that if he does not want me to be his teacher and do his home school work, then he will have to go to public school six hours a day.  He immediately straightens up and does the work.  He definitely wants to do home school.  But, why does he give me such hassle in the morning.  One morning this week I was near tears.  Home schooling just makes sense to me and we want this for our children.  They say they want it too.  But, I cannot go through this battle everyday.  I know this is his personality.  I have known that he is this intense since he was in the womb.  I just need to find a way to work with him better.  When I ask him to do his home school, I need him to sit down and do it.  He is a great kid, loving and we really get along well, except he likes to be his own boss and I understand that.  I just have to figure out how to let him be his own boss while still getting stuff done.

Kristiana gave up her pacifier this week.  We were going to the store and I told her that she could pick out a special toy if she gave up her pacifier forever.  She agreed.  We packed up her pacis and went to the store.  She picked her toy and paid for it with the pacis.  From that moment on she understood that she was done with pacis.  She did not ask for the pacifier the rest of the day.  She did mention that she just wanted to see Annie's pacis at bed time.  Then she went to be bed without any fuss.  She has not tried to take Annie's paci like I expected either.   She has been without it for days now and she is still fine.  Although, we have heard a lot more screaming from this little girl lately.  She has one less coping device and so when she gets frustrated, she just screams and screams.  Her first reaction to anything that troubles her is to scream or whine.  I am working hard to help her react by communicating her frustrations better .  Poor baby girl still has fluid in her ear as well.  The doctor's office has not called me back, but I am thinking she will be getting a tube in her ear very soon.  This will probably help her communication and touchiness.

Annie thinks she is just as big as the other kids.  It has been really amazing to see her blossom from baby to little girl.  She has been sleeping in a big bed and sitting in a booster chair.  She babbles at us like she is really talking.  I say babble, but I am pretty sure she is trying to say real things.  She definitely understands a lot of what we are saying to her.  She plays like the other kids.  When they sit down to color, she tries to color on paper too.  I took her to a gymnastics gym free play and she did not want to play in the toddler area.  She played with the big kids.  She hung on the bar and swung.  She toddled on the balance beam.  They have a long trampoline to run on and she waited in line and ran down it.  It was hilarious to see a baby act like a big kid and do it with skill.  She wore me out.  She is so sure-footed.  But, this does not surprise me.  Alex and Kristiana were just the same.  When Kristiana was Annie's age she was scaling the big kid play ground with speed and agility.

Baby #4 is 25 weeks gestation and growing.  I felt pretty good and STRONG this week, because I went to the gym.  I am just as happy and excited about this baby as the rest, but I am more at ease with my 5 years and 4 babies worth of experience.  In other news, Baby #4 has a name.  We are pretty settled on it.  It came to us very naturally as did the other kids.  It is a name we have long considered and the right child has come along to receive it.  I asked the kids what they would like to name the baby and after they came up with some silly names like, "Thunder Go Awesome," they asked me to list a few.  After hearing the list, they picked one.  They were pretty certain of the name choice.  Once Alex makes up his mind, no one can change it.  We are going to call our little girl, Lucy Macaria (St. Macarius and Greek for blessed).  I really wanted her first name to be Macaria.  But I could not sell my husband on it (or anyone else, but he's the only one who counts).  We all love Lucy.  Kristiana can't wait to call her Lulu.

Oh, was that too much to read?  Well, I know some will just want to skip to this next part, and I don't blame you.  A few snapshots from the week.

Look! We discovered how to get Alex to eat vegetables.  
It's called, "Green Slime Smoothie."  Alex saw it on Allrecipes.com while I was looking for recipes for our weekly menu.  
He had to try it.  It consists of strawberries, bananas, yogurt and spinach.

Two months ago, Alex was given a fast food kids meal toy (blue bird on the right) while I was at my insurance agent's office.  
This week he asked if we could get more of these toys.  They're called Dino Tots.  He calls them Dino Tops, because they only have a top.  
I said that I am sure the fast food place did not have the toys anymore.  But we decided to make a TyrannoTot out of felt.  I made the dino on the left one afternoon this week.

Here is proof that we painted our house and that Annie thinks she is older and bigger than she is.
She speedily, scaled this 8 foot ladder all by herself .  Daddy spotted for safety measures.  
But, she was so quick he almost did not get there in time for her to make it to the top.  Crazy kid.

The Important, Ordinary Day

Woke up this morning and went to pray.  As usual a few minutes later one of the children joined me and curled up in my lap.  Monday it was Annie; Tuesday was Alex and today was Kristiana.  When the kids sit in my lap I feel distracted and rushed, but I am glad I am getting this time to pray anyway.  All the children were awake and hungry minutes after I finished praying.  I kept thinking I need to get a shower, but had things to attend to.  Around 8:00 a.m. my husband woke up and asked me what time Kristiana's ear doctor appointment was.  "Oh! I completely forgot.  Thank you, honey! It's at 8:30!"  So I jumped in the shower and asked my husband to help the kids get on their shoes.  We were out the door ten minutes after my husband had initially alerted me and showed up on time.

At the doctor we had to wait a long time, because their computers were down.  Oh boy! I questioned whether it was right of them to make everyone wait so long or if they should reschedule some people.  It was very difficult to corral three preschool aged kids in an inhospitable place for so long.  But we finally saw the doctor, which I was grateful for and it did seem like they were trying really hard to keep things moving.  By the time the doctor came in to see us Annie was bored to tears and had trouble not fussing and screaming.  It was hard to converse with the doctor.  He said one of Kristiana's eardrums did not look good, but was not a candidate for a tube yet.  The other ear already has a tube.  I asked if it did not look good because she was just getting over a cold or if it just did not look healthy in general.  He said it just did not look healthy.  There was no fluid behind it and it was vibrating normally, but not healthy looking.  Later that day she complained about ear pain, which now I have to call back and ask if it could be infected.  Poor girl.

After the long time at the doctor's office, I decided to run some errands.  We went to Michaels to pick up a birthday present, but it turned into a more expensive trip than I anticipated.  I really need to be more strict with myself and what I intend to spend when I go into stores like this.  You would laugh at me if you really knew how little I spent and the fact that I am complaining.  But, I did not go in there thinking I would spend that much.

Then I went to a gym and signed up for a gym membership.  Now I have no more excuses, I have to go get exercise.  I am paying for it after all.  Or what I am really paying for is the childcare, which is wonderfully reasonable when you consider you get childcare and a top fitness facility.  My children played in the kids area while I signed up for membership and loved it.  They loved it when I took them to the YMCA in Washington over the summer.  After they played at the Washington Y, they were rewarded by getting to play in the pool afterward, but they will not have that same great kids pool now.  I have a feeling they will tire of this kids place quickly.  But, I am going to ride out their enthusiasm while it lasts.

We finally made it home at lunchtime.  Annie was asleep.  She has been having lots of trouble sleeping on her own since our holiday travels.  But, today I laid her down and she slept for two hours.  It was a much needed rest for her and mommy.

I made myself and the other kids lunch and they watched television for a couple of hours.  In the meantime, I checked my email and Facebook.  Then I worked on my Mother's Rule.  This Rule is my schedule/rule that allows me to serve God and the five P's of life best (Prayer, Person, Partner, Parent, Provider).  I am still working on reading "A Mother's Rule of Life."  I took a break to do some other reading.  Now I feel I need to complete this book and refine my Rule.  I hope this Rule will suit my family as well, because parts of it I will need their cooperation--like for attending family prayer, chores, getting dressed in the morning and so forth.  I like how this book emphasizes self-awareness and serving God first.

After our long lunch break, I asked the kids to clean up their toys because friends were coming over and it's much nicer to play in an area that is cleaned up and organized.  They agreed and promptly moved the toys they wanted to play with to a clean open space in the house and began to play.  Smart kids, but not exactly what I had in mind.  Nevertheless, they were quietly and creatively playing.  So I decided to tidy their play area, which I knew I was going to help them with anyway, and just let them play.

While I was tidying the toys, my mom called to see how I was doing and to suggest names for our baby.  I told her that I did not think that we would name our baby any of the names she suggested.  None of them really hit me.  But, I am open to hearing name, because you never know when you will hear the perfect name.  I mentioned that the kids had already picked a name they liked for the baby.  And she immediately said she did not like it.  I explained that Andrew and I liked it too and it was a name we had considered before.  Then she was so bold to say that we should choose a name that was aesthetically pleasing.  It was a stab to the heart.  Of all the rude things to say.  It did not occur to her that when I said WE LIKED the name that we felt it was aesthetically pleasing and she should be respectful of a name we liked.  (I should mention that the name is not unusual or harsh to the ear).  Yes, fire rained down from there.  It was not a civil conversation from that point on.  I took a jab back at what she had named me.  She of course did not like my jab and was offended by my accusation that perhaps my name was not the most aesthetically pleasing choice.  But, at least she knew what it felt like when she had said what she said to me.  This is my child to name after all, and I promised it will be a tasteful, holy name.  Say what you will about my name, but no one ever pronounced it right at first glance.  It was hard to say at loud gatherings.  But, eventually I grew to love my name and owned the identity for myself.

Finally, friends came over and we all visited and played.  Things got crazy.  Sometimes I worry that my children lack social graces.  It may be because of their age or may be because every thing your own children do seems so much worse, and everyone else's children seem perfectly, well-behaved, which they would tell you otherwise.  It was not my finest dinner soiree and I am so embarrassed at my service.  There was a lot of "it's okay" said.  Fortunately, the people we were visiting with are like family and it really is okay to be a little embarrassing amongst people you are so close with.

Everyone was exhausted at the end of the day and crashed after a short clean up.  This included my husband.  And I am sitting up late into the night logging my day.  I cannot tell you why it seemed so important to log this day of all days.  It seems every day is busy and eventful.  I do not know what I would do with myself if my life were not so full.  I am so very grateful to be graced in this way--Good and loving God, perfect husband, beautiful children, good healthcare, money in our pockets, time for oneself, prosperous decisions, a bounty to tidy, amazing friends to share our bread. Wow, is all I have to say.

I do not know how they ended up like this, but I just had to take a picture.  
I think Annie just came and sat on Kristiana who was lying on the floor fussing.

Isn't She Lovely?

I am in love with this sweet face.  We did not get 3D ultrasound pictures of the other kids because they all had their faces hidden.  But, this is quite something.  Technology is AMAZING.  We have a lot to be thankful for.  Our baby is totally healthy and beautiful.  We now know that our fourth child is a girl.  This is much to our son's chagrin.  He had a big meltdown that he would not have a brother.  We explained to him that it was good to be the only son, because it meant special one on one father-son time with Daddy.  My husband was a little worried too.  As he told the ultrasound technician, "You don't understand. Our daughters are really beautiful and I think we are all in a lot of trouble."  Then of course, he worried about paying for weddings and or a dowry to a religious order.  But, I said we just need to teach our daughters to sew and bake cakes and arrange flowers and all the sisters can help with each others weddings.  This is a good thing to have three girls in a row.

Festive New Year's Child

7 Quick Takes - 2012 New Year's Resolutions

In the past I have said I don't like New Year's Resolutions.  In my opinion, making a resolution is a guarantee to fail, because it is puts undue pressure on oneself.   Plus, if you want to improve yourself, just do it.  No "resolution" is needed.  I am not saying it will not be difficult.  We can all improve, right?  Here I go again, making resolutions against my own principles that I should not--Baring all my weaknesses here.  But, I am going to take this not so much as a resolution, but rather things I could improve upon.

Here are my suggestions for myself, so I can be better in 2012:

1. Pray. Pray formally, in private, without failing, twice a day, and pray formally with the family twice a day.  Along with prayer at meal times that will make seven times a day--a holy number.  Every time my routine changes a little, it is difficult to keep prayer consistent.

2. Exercise three times a week--Join a gym with childcare!  I think about getting exercise all the time, but unless I can get away from the kids, it's not going to happen.  I also feel bad about leaving them with my husband when he gets off work, because he has already had a long day and me too.  It would be better if I could go earlier in the day and have someone keep the kids.

3. Eat better - In line with the previous resolution, eat smaller, controlled portion sizes and only eat when I really feel hungry.  Delicious holiday food is really hard to eat moderately.  I always get to thinking I need to watch portions during this time. ;-)

4. T.V. Habits - Stop allowing the children to watch so much T.V. - Stop using the T.V. as a crutch.  Usually the kids watch T.V. first thing in the morning before everyone is ready to do anything else.  And they watch T.V. around lunch time while I put the baby down for a nap.  The T.V. is the only thing that keeps them quiet and occupied while I lay her down and she falls asleep.  Then I let them watch for an hour or so and I get time to make lunch for everyone and eat my own lunch in peace.  But, I would like to see them go more days without T.V. at all, or only during quiet time.  I would like to figure out what to do with the kids when I need them to be quiet.

5. Date my husband.  I really miss one-on-one time with my best friend.  I could spend every minute of every day with him and never be tired of him. :-)  As it is, we spend a lot of time with each other, but hardly ever without the kids.  Therefore, much of the time we are together we are pre-occupied and stressed.  We need some stress free time together.

6. Quiet time with God--Write an Icon that is not a child's icon.  This longing never goes away.  I guess I need to spend less time on the computer, or something.  Perhaps all those books I am reading will have to wait a little longer.

7. Patience without yelling, anger or spanking, even when I am tired, stressed and not feeling well.  Alex is older and can be reasoned with, I have seen a lot of improvement in behavior by remaining calm and working through whatever behavior problem.  I need to be conscientious about how I treat ALL the people in my life.  I need to treat everyone with kindness, gentleness, respect and cheer.  These are the traits I am trying to teach my children.

With a lot of these I need my husband's cooperation and support.  I think I have an important conversation forthcoming with my other half.

 

 

 

 

 

The Nativity Project

It's finally done.  A friend asked me to help her make Nativity figures so that she could sew a plush Nativity set that her kids could play with, without breaking.  I drew the figures and she is having them printed on fabric and will sew them.  I took my drawings and laminated them and the kids painted a cave.  Then we placed the figures as though it were a Nativity set.  I laminated the figures so we can reuse them from year to year.

Kristiana was my big helper.  She worked the longest and hardest on it.

This time Annie helped paint.  She finger painted. :-)

This is one of my favorite parts of the set - the two angels and the star.

Happy Christmas Season!

S'nami Boh - God is With Us

Christ is Born! Glorify Him!

As much as l love the truly unique food which helps to commemorate Christmas Eve, Holy Supper celebrations, this year I really enjoyed the fellowship celebrating the meal with our whole church.

Folks brought their cheer and their finest cooking skills.  We began by eating blessed garlic dipped in honey commemorating the bitter sweetness of life.  This was followed by a wonderful meatless meal.  Cedar plank salmon, pyrohies (potato stuffed pasta), kutya (honey and wheat porridge), kapusta (sauerkraut and peas), fruit, cabbage slaw, mushroom soup, stuffed cabbage and bread.  I did not take pictures of any of the food.  I was so excited about it, I was eager to make it disappear into my belly!

All of the children present were very adorable and squirmy.  One person told us their children were with a babysitter.  While we think it is important for the children to be present, the 30th time the toddler wants to be picked up, then put down, then runs up the aisle, you start to think a babysitter for evening Liturgies is a VERY good idea. ;-)

I made braided cheese bread for the priests for Christmas.  I was particularly pleased by the results, because totally winged it.  I did not have a recipe and I made tasty bread!  This is a big accomplishment, because I am not a baker.

This is Sister Vitae.  She was one of the kids who was in the youth group I lead.  
We have not seen her since our wedding nearly 7 years ago.  A lot has changed since then.

P.S. I think my camera is on it way out.  It does not seem to be focusing well anymore.  It's only three years old. :-(

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Momma Renee's Advice for Finding a Mate

I woke up in the night the other night and dating advice is all that was running through my head.  Strange, I know.  But, pregnancy hormones will do strange things to me in the middle of the night.  Anyhow, I thought I would write them down and try to formalize them.  Perhaps, someday my children will benefit.

This advice is for the purposes of finding a life long mate.  And in my experience this advice leads to marriage success.

1. Pray about it—pray for God’s will to be done.  Freshman year of college, I tried out a couple of awkward college relationships (too much expected early intimacy, too much guessing where one stands) and I thought, this really is not working out for me.  I decided to give it up, get my head straight, focus on academics and just seek God first.  I simply was not interested in this awkward dating game.  Finally after a happy semester hiatus, I prayed.  I prayed to God for Him to bring me to my husband, or to a religious vocation.  I prayed to have no hand in this.  I prayed that I only wanted to follow His will in this matter.  I prayed telling God I was surrendering this all to Him.  God was now in charge.  Soon after I began emailing a few college friends over the summer break from school.  One friend stood out.  It was clear I was enamored, but I was still not pursuing this friend in any other manner than frank conversations about God and other transcendental ideas.  We were simply enjoying a burgeoning friendship.  One evening we were talking about something completely mundane, but I prayed to my Guardian Angel in the middle of our conversation that my friend would want to talk about his Orthodoxy, as I saw this as a conflict that would keep us apart.  At that moment, he asked me what I thought of his Orthodoxy.  I pardoned myself for a moment as I freaked out in another room and got myself a glass of water.  There was no reason on earth, at that moment, he should have asked that question other than Divine intervention.  From that point our relationship exploded into a lot more, as I like to think guided by the hand of our Maker.  As I have explained before when we finally came around to more in our relationship my future husband was clear that he was interested in courtship with the intent to marry and not simply dating.  Therefore, in your relationship seeking, both in friendship and love, be sure to pray for GOD’S WILL BE DONE.

2. Know what you believe.  It is incredibly hard to solidify what you want in a mate if you yourself are not solid in what you believe.  You should have a firm grasp on central beliefs essential to life.  Such matters include mind, body and soul (e.g. faith, money, nutrition, exercise). This will help in discerning who would be a suitable mate.

When your beliefs are still changing and forming and you have committed yourself to a partner, that person may not see fit to change his/her beliefs as you seek what is true.  Your relationship is likely to end.  This is why the Catholic Church recommends that Catholics marry the same denomination or someone who is seeking communion with Catholic beliefs.  Catholicism provides for a solid belief system covering a broad spectrum of life.  If you are going to commit to becoming “one flesh,” you must believe in the same things to act as one flesh.

That is not to say that your future mate cannot help you discover and solidify what you believe.  However, once in a relationship, when irrational, erotic, emotions take hold, and especially if it is a physical relationship, it’s hard to discern whether what you have come to believe through this person is true.  It is much easier to use one’s knowledge and intellect to discern true beliefs outside of the emotional factors of romantic relationship.

3. Good character is key.  It is obvious that you do not want a lasting relationship with someone who lies, cheats, steals.  Even little dishonesties could lead to bigger ones.  He/she should not be immoderate/intemperate either.  If he/she cannot control his/her appetites this could play a big role in damaging your relationship later.   A person who habitually overeats could become morbidly obese and die—similarly for a person who drinks too much; smokes.  A person who gambles, or person who is addicted to material goods, leads to destitution.  

I always say that a man who cannot fast, or you have never seen fast will not make a good mate, because he will not sacrifice for you or anyone…Likewise, your mate should protect your own virtue.  You should not be asked to do things against your own moral character and beliefs.

Further, your partner should keep company of the same high moral character.  Sometimes people have family members or childhood friends of poor character.  It is often difficult for people to see the faults of such friends, because it is someone they have loved from childhood, and or cannot avoid the person.  At which you should point out that the person is of poor character and you both should have limited contact with that person.  At this, your partner should agree and protect the virtue of you both.  Association with people of poor moral character will always result in damage to you.

4. Save it for marriage. Keep physical relations limited during courtship.  This is the most difficult for those courting (dating) to keep.  Everything about our culture, and our natural chemistry, tells us that we ought to have physical relations with those to whom they are attracted.  So why not test out the fun physical stuff?  Well, simply put, the first three dating advices are near impossible to discover and complete when intercourse is on the mind.  Further, there is a lot of game play involved before getting into bed.  This takes up a lot of time that could be better spent in procuring a solid friendship and partnership with your future mate.  People who court without falling to a relationship’s physical nature marry quickly.  This is NOT because they are trying to hurry up and make their relationship legitimate so the can have legitimate physical relations.  They come to the conclusion of marriage quickly because they did not play a lot of games trying to get into bed with each other.  Rather they spent a lot of time sharing beliefs and coming to understand the whole person.  (People make mistakes.  But, you can always try and try again.)

5. No secrets amongst partners.  Total honesty about your beliefs and past life is important.  Do not pretend that you share the same beliefs if you do not.  Do not pretend you have achieved more than you have.  If there is some ideal you hope to achieve, be honest and humble that you have not accomplished it, but hope to.  Tell the truth about your past.  Your past is what made you.  Share also what you learned from your past and how you became a better.  It will always come back on to you if dishonesty plays a role in your relationship.

6. Honor thy father and mother.  In general, your future mate should have a loving relationship with parental like figures.  Not everyone is privy to good parents.  But, your future mate should be able to forgive his/her parents their faults and love them for the good things they did.  And if there really was nothing to love about his/her parents, then he/she should have cut all ties and have a loving parental relationship with someone who was a nurturing parental figure.   If there is no one like this in your future mate’s life, this is a sign he/she will not be able to have a successful, permanent, loving relationship with you.  Some people are damaged and your love will not fix it.  They have to heal from within.

That’s what I have for now.  I am sure there are lots of well-written courtship books that could say this better than I.  But, should my kids ever ask my advice (they likely never will), I can say, “Funny you should ask. I have just the thing for you.”

 

 

 

The Conception of Blessed Theotokos

Here is a late post for the feast.  All last week I was very ill with the flu and strep throat.  I did manage to muscle through the week caring for the children.  We even managed to write the icon of the Conception of Blessed Theotokos, but I did not get pictures of the kids working.  Kristiana finished her icon of many colors , but Alex did not finish his.  I have been working on a major Nativity project, so I did not work on this icon.  But, I thought that such a feast could not pass without remembrance.  I scanned the Icon I drew and decided to fill it in in paint.  It's a far cry from iconography, but it is a remembrance.

Troparion (Tone 4)

Today the bonds of barrenness are broken,

God has heard the prayers of Joachim and Anna.

He has promised them beyond all their hopes,

To bear the Maiden of God

By whom the Uncircumscribed One was born as mortal man,

Who commanded an angel to cry to Her:

Rejoice, O Full of Grace, the Lord is with You!

Kontakion (Tone 4)

Today the universe rejoices,

For Anna has conceived the Theotokos through God's dispensation,

For she has brought forth the One who is to bear the Ineffable Word!

Last Year's Post:

http://theclaytonianchronicle.blogspot.com/2010/12/icon-writing-with-kids-conception-of.html

Legendary St. Nicholas

I am really so confused about why we lie to children about St. Nicholas and Santa Klaus alike.  A few years back when people started to tell my kids about Santa Klaus, of course it was all lies--"Legends" I guess people call it.  Then of course, friends and family asked us about what lies we would be telling our children--you know, so they could keep our lies consistent with the lies they were going to tell our children about Santa.  I felt the need to keep the lies consistent as well, especially since this year my son has 101 questions about St. Nicholas/Santa, which is what I have turned the lie into.  The more questions he asks the more lies I have to make up on the spot.  Initially, it did not occur to me to tell the truth, because Santa was a fun part of childhood for me.  It took me to eight or nine to stop believing.  I felt like a grownup that year but, if you think about it, that's not very old.  When the lies began for our kids, I initially thought that I did not want to be Scroogey and banish such fun from childhood.  However, this year as Alex asks more questions the more I have bitter taste in my mouth about lying.

Why can we not tell the children the true story of St. Nicholas including the fact that he is dead and in heaven?  I suppose because most of the stories of St. Nicholas that survive in perpetuity are that of mythological legend.  It's really no better than all the stories we make up or is it?  There are some very good lessons to be learned from those legends that I think are lost today.  The legend of St. Nicholas giving dowries secretly in the stockings of three sisters teaches of giving to the less fortunate.  There are legends of him protecting children and this teaches us to protect the helpless.  All of the legends, involve acts of great faith, fasting, prayer, works of mercy and almsgiving.  These things are good.  Perhaps we ought to do better learning the proper legends rather than making up our personal pack of family lies about St. Nicholas.

I think a far better thing would be to tell the children that they are receiving gifts in secret, because that is the way St. Nicholas gave gifts, not because St. Nicholas is actually the one giving them.  We want to give in this way for several reasons.  If we give in secret we need not take glory for ourselves.  All glory ought to be given to God who gave us all things.  We must not forget this fact that all we have are not rights, but gifts from God.  We also ought to give in secret so as not to embarrass the recipient as one may not feel worthy and not accept the gift.  No one likes the feeling of receiving a hand out.

The pack of lies of has been told to my children for this year and will sustain through Christmas, because we have family obligations to fill (family traditions are important too).  However in the future, I would like to tell the kids the truth about the gifts and tell them the legends as well along with the corresponding morals.  It will be so much easier to not be making up lies and stories on the spot that do not express the meaning and importance of good works and gift giving during preparation for Christmas.  I think that we can really make this fun too.  For example, I think I will ask each grandparent to give a small secret gift for the kids stocking on St. Nicholas day next year.  The children will receive the gifts with an understanding that those who love them gave them gifts. They can give a larger not so secret gift to the kids on Christmas day.

One interesting thing that came out of the Alex's questioning this year was, "Why does St. Nicholas like to give to children?"  I told him it was because children have nothing.  Everything they have must be given to them, because they do not go to work and earn the things they have.  And even if kids did work, they would not be able to work enough to be able to support themselves.  So we must give to children.

…Okay enough heaviness.  How about pictures from the two St. Nicholas parties we went to:

Here is Alex telling St. Nicholas that he has only been "a little" good this year.  St. Nicholas told him he needed to be "a lot" good.

Here is Kristiana and St. Nicholas trying to divine toddler speak…Then St. Nicholas gave the kids gifts, but not in secret. (I guess the real gift givers were secret).

At the second, St. Nicholas party the kids are playing "Pass the Money Bag."  Music played and when it stopped the child holding the bag won the bag of chocolate coins.  But, she also had to come to me to learn a secret about St. Nicholas.  I told her that St. Nicholas would share the gold coins with others and I asked her to share them.  The little girl excitedly passed out the gold coins to everyone.  She was really sweet.

The kids put their shoes under the Christmas tree to receive a secret gift from St. Nicholas.

 

I made ornaments for the kids to decorate.  The far left is the back side of the ornament.  We also had coloring pages and a picture I drew that the kids could glue cotton balls on for a beard.

Alex drew the St. Nicholas below all by himself.

Finally, at our party I introduced the kids and mothers to the Ukrainian hymn "Children Who Love St. Nicholas" (http://www.stnicholascenter.org/pages/children-who-who-love/).

All the party ideas and coloring and materials are from www.stnicholascenter.org

Let's Make Lemonade Part II

 

Taste Testing the Lemon Rinds: Look at those great sour faces.

One giant lemon produced enough lemon juice to make about 1.5 quarts of lemonade.  It was tasty lemonade too.  We finished by the end of the day.

Let's Make Lemonade

My neighbor just gave me this giant, baby-head, sized lemon.  His brother sent it from his garden in Florida. Yum. It smells great.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

7 Quick Takes: Yoda

1. Faith and Tradition! - I am still learning the traditions of our Byzantine faith.  Some Byzantine family needs to write a book about all the traditions throughout the year complete with prayers and a cd of different tones for the prayers (please).  There are prayers for everything and it seems some people know where to find them, but we do not.  I would love to learn how to sing all the tones as well, because not only would I enjoy singing the troparians and so forth, but my kids would love it as well.  As it stands, I sing only the trisagion prayers and I think the kids get tired of it day after day.  

We started by learning the Great Fast and Pascha traditions.  In the past four years we have been learning the St. Phillip's fast and Christmas Eve traditions.  The Christmas Eve traditions are so wonderful and beautiful.  One thing we have never done is use a St. Phillip's Fast candelabra with the prayers.  But, hopefully for future Advent seasons we will do this…just thinking about Eastern traditions.

2. They call him, Yoda. In college, my husband was given the nickname, Yoda, among others, because he gave great sage advice to our peers.  Lately, my husband is full of good parenting and family ideas.  I do not know why he does not share them with me more often.  Day-by-day, I feel like I scritch and scratch, and barely get by parenting our children.  Honestly, I think I do pretty well, but it is a lot of hard work.  Here are three stories of how my husband has helped solve family problems.

3. Yoda Part 2 - Recently, we both struggled a lot with our daughters' sleeping habits.  13 month old Annie was still sleeping in our bed and no one was happy about it.  Kristiana was waking frequently and screaming at the top of her lungs.  So there was a lot of waking up in the night by both parents.  But, we problem solved together.  I moved Kristiana into Alex's room thinking that a roommate would squelch her nighttime fears.  They both liked the change, but she was still waking.  Kristiana was also taking milk to bed with her and she was requesting more milk in the night as though she were a little baby.  I told my husband she was cut off from milk.  She simply needed to eat more at dinner time.  He agreed, but he talked to her all day long about it reminding her that she was not allowed to request milk and she was not allowed to scream.  They seem to have a special bond.  All his talking to her really helped and now she is sleeping better--not always, but it's better.

4. Yoda Part 3 - With Annie, I bought a crib and moved her to the girls' room by herself.  She still would not go down by herself, but Andrew put a blanket over the end of her bed so she could not see light shining in from the door jam.  And she could not see us leaving after putting her in bed.  Now we can lay her down and leave immediately and she sleeps all night. Yay!  We will get some sleep before the next baby comes along.  And though I have enjoyed snuggling all night with our little babies the next baby will not be allowed to sleep in our bed.

5. Yoda Part 4 - The BEST advice of the week came from my husband at the end of last week.  He worries greatly about homeschooling Alex, because he is high intensity and non-compliant.  He gives me grief when I ask him to do his school lessons, which only take an hour if he is good about doing it.  We both feel Alex needs an outlet outside of the home, but public school is not our answer.  Our reasons for wanting to homeschool are concrete.  But, Andrew requested that I get more organized and start earlier in the day with Alex.  He said I should sit down on Sunday nights and plan out the entire week.  We should get up early get ourselves ready and then wake the kids.  Then each morning, after breakfast, after the kids dress, we pray, say the pledge of allegiance to the flag and dive right into homeschool.  This has worked brilliantly all week.  Kristiana gets little lessons too and enjoys it.  Annie can be a trouble maker though.  I try to get Alex done by 10:00 a.m. so we can have morning outings.  My problem now is what to do with the kids in the afternoon.  The kids play a little and spend a little time outside.  Alex always asks if he can play computer games, but he always wants to play too long and throws fits when he has to be done.  I feel like he needs to keep well occupied in the afternoon too…We are very much considering sending him to preschool next semester just so he can have a better outlet and more activity.

6.  Monkey - I have such trouble getting pictures of interesting things Annie does before she stops doing them.  She has begun to climb everything.  She drives me mad about it.  She will climb on top of the kitchen table for almost any reason and she will get into everything.  She started climbing to the top of our backyard play gym too.  This week, she decided she is brave enough to fling her tiny body down the slid with no assistance.  She goes flying down the wavy slide and bumps her head at the bottom, then comes crying to me for cuddles.  Then she goes back for more punishment.

7. Clever - One day last week, Annie dragged an outdoor patio pillow to the top of the play house.  When she got to the top she threw it up and climbed the rest of the way herself.  She took the pillow and threw it down the slide.  Then she slid down and landed on the pillow.  It was awesome and hilarious.  She did it two more times and I did not get the camera in time to film it!  She is way too little for such activities.  She is very mature mentally, but looks like a baby younger than a year.

 

A Christmas Poem You Have Never Heard

I have been reading poetry to Alex at the end of our home school lessons.  I have a poetry book that was my father's.  It's called, "This Land: An Anthology of Australian Poetry for Young People."  It is the best poetry book I have ever read.  Alas, a few years back I tried to get a couple more copies of it for my brother and sister, but it is out of print and very hard to find.  I emailed one shop in Australia that said online they had it in stock, but when they looked they could not find it.  So, I have one tattered, falling apart copy that my sister and brother and I used to battle over.  Right now it is in my possession, but I need to make copies and give it back to family.

Here is a Christmas poem I read to Alex this week, which you have likely never heard because it is printed in an out of print Australian anthology.  But, the poem itself is fresh, beautiful, interesting and insightful.  It was written thoughtfully by a Catholic poet.  Perhaps, it may bring new thoughts and discussions within your family.

A Word from the Innkeeper

By Paul Grano

No luck, there's no room here.
There's not a corner of the yard
but has them sleeping packed
as close as pigeons in a market coop.
I'd not refuse you did I have a spot
where you could even seat yourself and wife.
Look for yourself--baggage and camels, and men,
women and kids, a rowdy, thieving mob,
sprawled everywhere. Now, are you satisfied?
In all my twenty years of keeping inns
I've never seen the like before.
Such avalanche of flesh, such herds of humans!
All day long for days
they've drifted in, mud to the knees,
with blistered feet, fagged and empty-bellied.
They've eaten the whole village out--
there's not a wineskin wet,
not a cheese remains.  And bread!
My friend, the baker, fell exhausted in a tub of dough.
They found him, sleeping there, a monstrous loaf!
Myself, I haven't slept these three nights past.
I daren't--they'd pinch the very doors for wood.
Well, there it's is, nothing I can do.
The Government's to blame--
I ask you, who but fools would take
a census in the wintertime?
A bitter winter, too, it is--
and if I am a weather-man--they say I am--
my father was, he knew the signs--
and shifting ants for floods, and all the rest--
I'd say the sky is full of snow.
Make on, and find some shelter for your wife.
A pretty girl, she is.  You'll be a father soon?
God grant you, sir, a lusty son.
Let's see, let's see--two hundred yards along
you'll strike a narrow track, a cattle-pad,
that branches to the right and leads
into the hills where there are caves.
At least you'll have a roof, and dung for fire--
the cattle shelter there--
but, even so, they're cleaner than the cattle I have here.
The wind has fallen.  There's a flake of snow--
a frozen swallow, if you like poetic terms.
My father was a poet. But make faster.
Yes, light your latern now. The stars
are coming out.  How sharp and cold they are,
like points of silvered spears!  They say
a brand new star arrived the other day,
but stars to me are much alike as sheep.
Good night, good night, my friend.  A sound roof,
and a dry bed, and a sunny morning!
Good night.  See you do not miss the track--
Two hundred yards along, and to the right.
Good night.

 

 

Prepare the Way for the Lord

A lot of people get indignant about store Christmas displays going up right after Halloween.  However, for a lot of reasons this makes sense.  In the Eastern Catholic Church (and Orthodox), we begin our journey to Christ's Nativity celebration on November 15.  This is 40 days before the Feast of Christmas.  For 40 days we fast, pray, offer works of mercy and give alms all in the name of Christ, and preparing our souls to be present at the celebration of Christ's birth.  Upon Christmas we begin merrymaking and we do not quit until 40 days later.  The preparation and celebration periods are similar to that of Easter.

So, as an Eastern Christian, I say prepare your homes and your hearts.  We cannot prepare if we are not reminded everywhere we go.  This does not mean we should get all decked out for Christmas immediately.  It means hang a wreath to remember the Eternal life God promises, but do not hang the merry lights which remind us Christ is with us.  We will save the lights for the Christmas season.  Set out the Nativity displays but do not place the baby for whom we are waiting to be born.   Go ahead and take advantage of the pre-Christmas sales and give, give, give.  But do not open one's own gifts until Christmas.  St. Nicholas, Bishop of Myra, is our greatest example of one who displays the true spirit of Christmas.  He spent his life fasting for the feasts and giving to others.

 

What I get indignant about is being invited to a bunch of Christmas parties before Christmas with lots of lavish feasts and ridiculous menial gift exchanges without a single nod to the poor, needy, sick, imprisoned.  I hate to walk the neighborhood the week after the Christmas season has begun and see the Christmas trees pitched out beside the road; and all the Christmas lights come down.  If one pitches out Christmas immediately after it is begun, we ARE left with that empty, consumerist feeling.  On the other hand, if we celebrate Christmas like the East, we may enjoy the merrymaking and the life and light Christ gave this world for longer and with much love until we begin the next fast.

Related Posts:

The Four Fasts: Preparing for Holiday Grace
http://www.catholicmothersonline.com/2010/11/the-four-fasts-preparing-for-holiday-grace/

Nativity Fast
http://theclaytonianchronicle.blogspot.com/2009/11/nativity-fast-commences.html

Holy Supper
http://theclaytonianchronicle.blogspot.com/2010/12/holy-supper-claytonopolis.html
http://theclaytonianchronicle.blogspot.com/2009/12/and-word-was-made-flesh.html

St. Nicholas' Feast
http://theclaytonianchronicle.blogspot.com/2009/12/st-nicholas-day.html

 

What Happens? Life?

 

And so it begins--the barrage of rude comments about my pregnancy.  It's not my nature to quip back snippy little comments.  I really do not feel like I need to be confrontational.  But really, what are these people thinking when they open their mouths and feel free to speak about my procreations.

It started at my first prenatal appointment.  The nurse was obviously new and she started asking questions and making rude little comments.  She asked me if it were my first pregnancy.  No, I have three children at home.  "Oh, how old are they?"  I tell her and she replied in a sad little voice, "Oh, did you mean to have them this close?"

"Uh, [it's really none of your business and completely inappropriate for you to say such things. What if I was having a hard time about it and broke down crying. Then what would you do? Do you have a counseling degree?] well, I would like a little more space in between, but this is fine too.  We are excited."  Then she had the nerve to ask me later if I was, "OK."  I told her, yes, and it is not my first show.  I am doing fine, better than fine.  This has been the most comfortable pregnancy yet.   Maybe, it would be a difficult situation for her, but all her intrusive questions and concern and overt disagreement with my "situation" really got on my nerves.  The next time was not much better and I will be talking to her supervisor next time if she makes one more flip comment.

However, today I received the rudest comment I have received to date.  I was at the grocery store, which is where I get the most comments because I run into the most people than anywhere else.  Most often, people say "You have your hands full," or ask how old my kids are, because they are all so small and look close in age.   I ran into a mom from the Karate studio where Alex took lessons.  She smiled, nodded and said, "Hi."  Then I stepped passed her and grabbed an onion.  She spotted my growing belly and said, "Oh, are you expecting."  I smiled and said,

"Yes."  She smiled again and said,

"Oh, [concerned sigh, as if she were consoling me] it happens.  So that's why you have been hiding out."  (Actually, not hiding out.  Quit.  We cannot afford the bait and switch membership increase.)

Huh? What? Smile nod, move away quickly.  "Alex, let's go. Move a little faster."

What "happens?"  Marital Union?  What did she mean? Did she mean "accidentally" having kids close together in age?  "Accidentally" having more kids than two, or three?  Why do you assume that this is something that just, uh, happened?  As if the preceding act between a man and a woman just happened--miraculously.  What am I supposed to say?  "No, the conception of this child was not an 'accident.'"  Really, it's none of her business how "it" happened.  And it's really wrong of her to assume that it just happened and that we did not mean for it to happen.  Just because she does not want anymore children does not mean I do not want any more and especially not close in age.  Oh the fallacies in her little statement and in her sigh.  We are really happy to have another child on the way.

I went home and told my husband and laughed.  He laughed too and said I should have replied, "Yes, it does.  A few times a week with my husband."

A friend of mine, who has six children, always has cute quips for such comments.  I can hear her now, "Yep, it sure does happen.  It works every time.  We have intercourse during ovulation and the sperm and the egg meet…"  At this point, someone starts blushing and she stops.

I do not mind, "You have your hands full."  It's not really a comment on anything more than they observe that I am busy with small children, which I am.  I do mind the tone some people say it with.  Whatever happened to "Unless you can say something nice, do not say anything at all."  Whatever happened to, "Congratulations."  "We wish you many blessings."  Why can our culture not just enjoy the beauty in the creation of new life? Choose life.